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Kim's Tuesday musings: How I loathed the 'Mother' finale (here be spoilers edition)

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Published:   |   Updated: April 1, 2014 at 10:51 AM

If they had just ended the show at the train station I might have written a different headline. Maybe not a “I loved the 'Mother' finale” but I wouldn't have disliked it as much.

But no, the producers and writers make sure that Robin and Ted got their perfect blue French horn ending. Which meant of course that Robin and Barney ended up divorcing three years after their wedding. A season of investing in the relationship shattered in 15 minutes. Way to go.

As far as I am concerned, last week's episode was the finale of “How I Met Your Mother.”

The entire season is devoted to three days and the last hour of the show covers, what, 15 years? I honestly don't remember because my eyes glazed over in anger and I couldn't read the timestamps anymore.

Other flaws:

♦ Barney snaps back to his horndog ways after his divorce showing little or no growth in his time with Robin. That's a lesson.

♦ The show should be renamed “How I Met Your Stepmother.” Nine years of stories about Robin, 32 minutes of stories about “The Mother” who, DIES. (called it!)

♦ The producers claim they knew how it was going to end the entire time. They even filmed the scene with the kids nine years ago to ensure they'd look the same age as they did at the beginning of the show. But how do we know they didn't film multiple endings with multiple scenarios allowing them to end up picking the one they wanted at the end? (Yeah, a conspiracy, I say. That's the Mulder in me.)

♦ As one of my Facebook friends pointed out last night, Bob Saget got screwed. He narrates the whole series and when it is finally time for the money-line “and that's how I met your mother,” Josh Radnor gets to say it. Maybe I'd be less ticked if it was Saget sitting on the sofa talking to the kids or holding the Blue French horn.

There were a few highlights:

♦ A pregnant Lily as Moby Dick on Halloween.

♦ Marshall finally gets to be a judge and makes rulings on his friends.

♦ Barney declaring his baby daughter (yeah, Barney has a kid after a month of sleeping with 31 women) the love of his life. How many ways can we say we love NPH?

Is it the worst finale in TV history? Nope. We're looking at you “Seinfeld.” And “Lost,” we're still ticked about that debacle. But it's no “Mary Tyler Moore Show” and certainly no “Newhart,” which still stands, to me, as the best comedy finale ever.

So long, Lando

Am I the only one who thinks “Dancing with the Stars” did the right thing and let Billy Dee Williams take the “doctors are making me leave” out?

It was mercy deployment.

See you in the clouds, Lando.

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