The circus that is Miley Cyrus' “Bangerz” world tour finally arrives in Tampa tomorrow night, and I'll be there reviewing it. Weird thing is, I feel like I've already seen it. As much as I've tried to avoid spoilers, my Twitter-Instagram-Facebook feeds have bombarded me with salacious tidbits, headlines and photos since the tour launched last month.
Here's what I'm expecting, based on what I've gleaned from all of that.
Weed leaf fashion - I'm not sure what it's called exactly, (a thong onesie? a legless leotard?) but the most buzzed-about outfit from this tour is decorated with rhinestone marijuana leaves from top to bottom.
The “world's tallest stripper” - Her name is Amazon Ashley, she reportedly stands 6-foot-7 and the rumor is that she's responsible for teaching Miley to twerk.
The flying hot dog - Whether it's goofy humor, the most unsubtle innuendo ever, or an ill-advised Oscar Mayer product placement, Miley apparently soars above the audience on a flying hot dog during the show.
A “shocking” kiss - It has been more than 10 years since the Madonna-Britney-Christina kiss at the MTV VMAs (long before the advent of DVRs, much to my 20-year-old self's frustration), and six years since Katy Perry released “I Kissed a Girl,” so Miley is a little late to the pop-starlet-girl-kissing gimmick. Nevertheless, she has been known to give female audience members a long smooch on the lips during this tour. Oh, and one time that audience member was Katy Perry.
A bunch of stuff I can't describe - Let's just say this. The Associated Press, apparently by accident, released some photos to its members of Miley doing stuff with a microphone, then immediately retracted/deleted them. No newspaper could have printed them anyway. I can't even really describe them here. That's all you're getting.